14 Months and counting

Today is our 14 month LID-a-versary. I'm not sure what is the appropriate gift for 14 months? Perhaps it's Paper...as in the tissues I've been using all day because I'm a weepy mess. Or maybe it's Crystal...for the wine glass I will be drinking out of shortly. Nope. That's not it. It must be Self Pity....because I sure am feeling sorry for myself today. By now I thought we would have been home for months and be getting ready for our first Christmas with Lily. Instead we wait....and wait...and then wait some more.

Goodie Goodie and the Evil Genius

It's too bad that Bill Cosby no longer hosts the televison show "Kids Say The Darnedest Things". I'm quite sure my niece, Christina, would be a permanent guest.

Christina is an extremely funny, quick witted, opinionated, sometimes sharped tongue, absolutely precious 7 year old. Believe me you never know what this child might say. Fair warning...if she starts a sentence with "I don't want to hurt your feelings...but...." hold on for dear life because you are about to be eviscerated. I could write an entire blog of just Christina-isms. Honestly, if I hadn't heard many of the things she has said with my own ears I'm sure I wouldn't believe she had really said them.

One of my all time favorite Christina-isms happened several years ago when Christina was about 4 1/2 or 5. Christina and I were at the grocery store together and they were selling bundles of flowers near the checkout stand. Christina asked me if we could buy a bundle of flowers and take them to the cemetery for Mom Mom. I was so touched and said "Sure!". We left the grocery store and headed to the cemetery. As we were getting out of the car to visit Mom's grave I grabbed the bundle of flowers. Christina said "Excuse me Aunt T, can I carry those? I don't want Mom Mom to think the flowers were your idea."

This summer Christina and one of her girlfriends were spending the day with me. We were driving up the road headed to the State Fair and the two girls were sitting in the back talking away (and, of course, I'm eavesdropping). Christina says to her friend, "Haley, Aunt T is really strict. When she says 'No' she means 'No' and it wont matter how many times we ask....and don't even think we're getting out of this car without sunscreen on."

Below are a few Christina-isms related to our adoption:

First, let's start with Lily's name. (By the way, this falls under the "I don't want to hurt your feelings" category.) One day Christina and I were talking about Lily and Christina said, "You know Aunt T, Lily is a pretty stupid name. I mean why don't you just name her Daisy, or Rose, or Tulip for that matter."

Recently my sister was talking to Christina about Tony and I going to China to pick up Lily. We have talked to Christina countless times about Lily but apparently this time a light bulb went off and Christina said "Do you mean Lily is going to look Chinese?!? I just assumed she would look like Aunt T and Uncle Tony. Well, it's probably better that way." This comment loses a little something without being able to hear Christina's incredulous tone.

The other day Patti and Christina are driving in the car and Christina tells her mother, "You know Mom, Aunt T is such a goodie goodie Lily is going to have to be an evil genius to get away with anything."

Don't worry. I'm sure she meant goodie goodie in the best possible way.

The kind of mother I want to be...

That's easy....I want to be like Laura! I just got back from a weekend visiting Laura, Rich, and the kids and I was once again reminded what a wonderful mother my friend is. I almost hate to talk about it because I think I make Laura sound like a Stepford Wife and that couldn't be further from the truth. Laura is just quite simply an amazing mom! On the drive home today I was trying to figure out what makes her so special. A few things immediately came to mind:

1. Laura really likes her kids. That may sound stupid but what I realized is that she doesn't just love her children she likes them, too! I don't mean she thinks she's their buddy I mean she sincerely enjoys spending time with them, she listens intently when they talk, she is respectful of them and their feelings, she is empathetic, and the list goes on and on.

2. Laura knows what is important to her and lives her life accordingly. She is very laid back and doesn't allow stress or outside pressures to rule her family's life. She exudes a kind of peace that I imagine if she could find a way to bottle and sell it would make a fortune. The fact that she is able to do that with three teenage sons is something I imagine a lot of parents would envy. She is definitely a 'don't sweat the small stuff' kind of person. You can walk into some people's home and feel like you are walking into a pressure-cooker...not so here. Over the last 10 years we have spent many weekends visiting and never once have had that "Dear God, please get us out of here" feeling. Their house is such a happy home we always feel a little sad when we leave!

3. Laura and Rich are a great couple. If children learn what they live (and I believe they do) Laura and Rich's kids are learning from a great example. Not only are they patient and kind with their kids they are patient and kind with each other. For example, they say "Please" and "Thank You" to each other and to the kids. They don't take each other or their children for granted. Again, this might seem like a stupid observation but I can't tell you how many times I've heard parents reprimand their children for having poor manners and then notice I don't need to look far to see where the children picked up their bad habits.

4. Laura and Rich have great kids. The boys are happy, fun, warm, sweet, and a joy to be around. They are confident without being cocky. They are polite, engaging, kind, compassionate and loving. Some of you could be thinking I might be a bit bias since I'm their Godmother...but there's no need to be....it's all true!

I could go on ad nauseam about all the wonderful things about Laura. Of course, I'm not surprised that Laura is such a wonderful mother because all the same traits make her my most cherished friend.

I keep bugging Laura to write a parenting book for me before Lily comes home. I don't think it's going to happen....perhaps she will concede to a Vulcan mind meld.